I almost gave up to make my portfolio work with two languages but after some teeth grinding and *facepalm* moments I got all scripts to work nicely together. I’ve already paid for an incredibly small ad space in a local newspaper and also got myself on Google Ads, so hopefully they’ll bring something that would keep me out of the possible shitty night/weekend shifts that the unemployment office is soon going to force me to apply for (when you’ve been unemployed for a certain amount of time, you’ll get the unfortunate pleasure to be forced to apply for certain shitty jobs that nobody else would ever want and these are offered to the unemployed just because the unemployment office is helping out with the pay check and the forcing part is that if you don’t apply or say that you don’t want to work in that shitty place, you’ll get no financial aids anymore, ah got to love the democracy here). I also have my new business cards from Moo. I’ve also done some e-mail advertising, but so far it’s been to a few chosen small local companies which don’t have websites or they have a very bad/outdated website. I just need to start making money fast so I can get mysel that Sony VAIO I’ve been drooling after. I should try to make a proper e-mail ad/newsletter to promote myself, but I have to say it’s hard! Trying to come up with something smart, promotive things to say that would get the possible client interested, especially when I’m usually a very modest person or at least I like to think so.

I got a letter from the school today where I applied to, I was excited to get it since I was sure it was the invitation to the entry exams. But the letter said instead “You don’t have enough points to participate the entry exam.” It took a while before I fully understood what it meant. J was sorry, he kept hugging me but I was in sort of shock. I had waited in anticipation for this, I was so excited about it, I really really really wanted to go there. But now I’m not allowed. I even went to another vocational college to upgrade my grades, but obviously my best was not enough (some of the very poor grades from my first school dragged along with me and was brought to my new diploma/certificate, I didn’t want to force myself to take maths, Swedish or Finnish again, I thought they wouldn’t matter, I got superb grades from the new subjects, teacher said I was one of the best in our class. Why was I so stupid and didn’t upgrade them all? Why didn’t I go to a proper school when I finished elementary school, why didn’t I know when I was 16 years old that what I want to be when I’m grown up? Why didn’t my sucky parents support me at all with my decisions or helped me to choose the right way, but instead put me down every step of the way when I decided to go vocational school for the first time and chose information technology. I was second grade person for them and it was a disgrace because I wanted to learn computers (and they were sure I chose it anyway because of all the boys there..). Why didn’t I choose an easier, more girly career? Nurse, kindergarten teacher, sales person.. anything else than computers and/or web design. And how the hell can you measure one’s creativity and their suitability to study visual communication with his/hers previous school success (maths and languages)? I’m not even allowed to come to entry exam and show them how fucking much I really would LOVE TO BE THERE.
I feel so sick right now, I’ve cried so much my head hurts, this was my backup plan for the future. Now I don’t know what to do.. or I do know what alternatives I have (more efficient freelancing, free apprenticeship somewhere or kick-start my own company again) but they all seem like a big giant leap to darkness and unknown right now. I wish I even had one person, friend, here I could talk to right now, but they’ve all moved away now from this crappy jobless town. And no, moving to southern Finland isn’t an option, my life is here and I’d like to keep it like that, I want more to my life than just a job. But a job is all I want right now.. confused? So am I.

Another bunch of lovely LUSH – products arrived in the mail this Friday along with another offer to buy prenatal vitamin package….Anyways I got some “Lip Squeak” lip balm, “Dreamwash” shower smoothie, Rockstar – soap & few samples of body lotions (Almond Kisses & something else I can’t remember). I’m so in love with these products! I just wish they’d have a store here in Oulu and I wouldn’t have to order from the web shop and pay the insane postage (8,50e!). Maybe I should start a LUSH-shop myself ;P

I can’t believe that I haven’t really “found” this fabulous site called Etsy.com before! I finally take a good look after Catie blogged about opening her own shop there. There was a shop featured on the front page and since I’m a sucker for all things glitter I clicked the link for Orglamix shop and ended buying 5 beautiful mineral eye shadows (2 of them is going to my sister, luckily she share’s my love and passion for glitter make up). Now I just can’t wait for them to arrive! Have you bought anything from Etsy? What are your favourite shops? I’ve been desperately searching for GOOD glitter make up/eye shadows for ages in the shops here but since I had no luck (except for those Rimmel glitter rollers I’ve bought years ago!) I had to search the internet for them. I also purchased Urban Decay eye shadow (Hot Pants) from Amazon UK which arrived today but I haven’t had a chance to try it yet. Today I also had a new haircut and it’s even shorter look than before, even though I swore to myself that I’d keep this length with my hair. My hairdresser is just too good in persuasion I guess Photos will follow, after all the snow today, my hair doesn’t look that representative.

1. Leave me a comment saying, “Interview me!”
2. I will respond by asking you five questions. I get to pick the questions. I can ask anything from the colour of your eyes to your favourite brand of best prenatal vitamins.
3. You will post the answers to the questions (and the questions themselves) on your blog or journal.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions. And thus the endless cycle of the meme goes on and on and on and on..

Me and my mom booked a table from the flea market for two weeks now. My mom got a pretty good income of it, but all I could sell was my old drinking glasses, few desert bowls and my very old hip hop clothes I had to buy when it was the “it” thing to wear in the 90s. I’m trying to sell everything I don’t need anymore, including old clothes, books, jewellery, shoes etc. and I’m making J do the same. We need to clear out all the old trash from the past 8 years we’ve gathered and don’t need anymore. And if someone wants to buy our old stuff, even better!

We just bought a new car yesterday, it wasn’t new as brand new, but new to us (as in used car). Our old one (Ford Mondeo, year 1993) was coughing up badly with other minor & not so minor faults so it was about time to change it, it was getting old and it was just easier this way than start to repair it. This was Ford Focus (year 20000) and it’s colour is gold (or metal yellow if you wish), the car salesman thought it was funny that we bought a gold coloured car, when Jari’s last name has “gold” in it We won’t get it until Monday though, since the bank hadn’t transferred the money to us yet & the salesman didn’t have proper paperwork yet done and we have to remember to get a new car insurance before it too. It gives us time to clean our junk from the car too. Photos will follow

Leave me a comment o’ randomness; your favourite quote, the best sandwich in the world, a good song lyric, what colour pants you’re wearing and I’ll respond with five questions you can answer in your own blog leaving with them an open invitation for other people to give you comments o’ randomness. Then you can ask them questions and before you know it we’ll all know everything about everyone – even if we’ve never met!

I can’t believe it really was +30°C today in the sun! I was forced to put on just my t-shirt and capri pants and we could go to my mom’s by bike! Insane! And later when I got back, I had to wear a skirt. Whaaatta heck! Why the heck do I have to suffer from the heat! I sweat just too much and I have to get my acne treatment bottles out again, sweaty face gives me spots. And yes all you summer lovers I know how much you like when it’s hot but I don’t! I don’t handle heat well, I can’t stand it. If I’m out in the sun for too long I get a head ache and feel nauseated. My feet especially don’t like the heat, they swell right when it hits over +20°C and they hurt (I can blame the family genes for that). So that was my dose of too much information of the day.

So A LOT has been going on, I’ve been feeling like I’ve got thousand things on my mind and so many things to worry about (grandpa the most) but now almost all is solved so easily that I can’t believe it. It’s over midnight now and I’ve got an early wake up call, I’d still have a job interview and lipofuze reviews to blog about but I’ll save it for the next time. If you made it this far, good for you Now I’m over and out.